Cat Scratch Fever
by ChubbyBunny
Summary: Bulma has gone away for a meeting, leaving the Prince of all Saiyans to watch Scratch the cat. Will either survive?


'Hey Babe!

I had an emergency meeting in the city; I won't be able to be back until tomorrow night. I tried calling your phone but it went straight to voicemail (seriously, did you break it again or lose it? It's the third one this month).

Dad and mom are still on vacation, and I promised Trunks he could stay at Goten's tonight. Would you mind watching after Scratch? All you have to do is feed him two scoops of cat food in the morning, and two in the evening. Also, change his litter before bed or he won't leave you alone!

Anyways, give me a call when you can. I miss your cranky butt already!

Love you stud,

Queen of your heart XOXO'

Vegeta stared at the note, his wife's familiar handwriting taunting him. Watch the cat? What was he, an errand boy? Surely the beast would be fine on its own. Any creature who was incapable of foraging it's own food was as good as useless. He crumpled the note and threw it in the trash on the way to the fridge.

And besides, he still had the phone in question. He just 'accidentally' let it run out of battery. As much as he lov-cared about his wife the last thing he wanted was her calling him twenty times while he was attempting to train.

He pulled open the fridge, pleased to see Bunny had meal prepped for him. There was a large stack of Tupperware, his name written with little hearts surrounding it. His jaw tightened ; His wife's mother was just as ridiculous as she was. Vegeta pulled out a large container and a bottle of water, turning to place them on the kitchen island behind him-

There was the beast in question. Scratch sat staring at him with his ridiculous, large eyes.

"MOW." He said.

Vegeta sneered, "The hell you want, cat?"

Scratch blinked, "MOW."

Vegeta felt his left eye begin to twitch, "Get out of here, I'm busy."

Scratch yawned, leisurely lifting his leg and licking his privates.

"Wha-oh my God you are disgusting!" Vegeta snarled, "Have you no decency? Shoo, beast!" He nudged the cat off of the island, Scratch easily landing on his feet.

The little black animal looked up at him from the floor, "MOW!"

"Serves you right," Vegeta muttered, pulling out the stool and sitting down. He cracked open the lid of the Tupperware, the delicious smell of steak wafting out-

THUMP!

Vegeta looked to his right. There was Scratch, blinking at him. Growling, Vegeta turned back to his breakfast, all the while aware that the cat was staring intently at the side of his head. He managed to eat a few bites before he noticed his water bottle moving. Eyes narrowing he watched Scratch pawing at it, slowly pushing it towards the edge of the counter. Once it was teetering, Scratch's eyes locked with his.

"MOW."

Vegeta grit his teeth, "Don't you fucking DARE-"

Scratch tapped it with his paw, sending it falling over the edge of the island, the bottle hitting the ground and water spilling all over the floor. The little cat watched it, then turned back to Vegeta, who was gripping his fork and knife so tightly they were bent in half, "MOW."

Vegeta was barely containing his rage, the urge to Gallic gun the cat into oblivion almost winning out over the fear of what his wife would do if she came home to a cat shaped scorch mark in the wall, "You. Are. So. Fucking. Lucky. You. Beast." He ground out.

Scratch stood up, stretched, then brushed his tail right across Vegeta's nose as he hopped off the counter, trotting to a cabinet and pawing at it, "MOW."

"Ah, hungry are you? Good." Vegeta stuffed a large bite of steak in his mouth, "bet you wish you had some of this." He waved a fork with a steak piece on the end. Before he could blink, Scratch was flying through the air, sailing past his face, his tiny mouth taking hold of the steak from his fork as he gracefully landed on the other side of the floor. The cat daintily nibbled on the chunk of meat as Vegeta stared, mouth agape.

"Ugh!" Vegeta stood angrily, walking to the cabinet and pulling the door clean off the hinges. He gave it a passing glance before throwing it over his shoulder. There, sitting in the cabinet was the green bag of cat food. Vegeta grabbed the bag, carrying it to Scratch's bowl. Not bothering to measure, he dumped the entire contents into the tiny dish, the whole thing overflowing onto the ground in a large mound.

Scratch came up beside Vegeta, "MOW."

"There you are you abomination." Vegeta gestured with a wave, "you're welcome."

Scratch went to the dish, sniffed it, and then flicking his tail walked into the next room.

Vegeta watched him go with wide eyes, before angrily grabbing his breakfast and heading to the training chamber. That day he would imagine all of the training bots had stupid cat faces.

Vegeta grunted in his sleep, he'd been having pleasant dreams of smashing in Kakarots face; that is until his rival had grinned and said "MOW," as he was pulling his fist back to smash out his teeth.

"MOW."

Something was brushing against his nose, it made him want to sneeze. He tried brushing it away, but whatever was causing him to wake up was being very insistent. Blearily, he opened his eyes-

To see Scratch sitting on his chest.

"MOW." The cat bopped his nose with his paw.

Vegeta groaned, "what do you want now?"

"MOW." Scratch said again, hopping off of Vegeta and onto the floor, "MOW."

Somehow, Vegeta was just delirious enough to make himself sit up and follow the cat out of his room and down the stairs towards the bathroom nearest the home lab. Scratch walked in, the automatic lights turning on.

Vegeta blinked and rubbed his dark eyes, vision finally focusing.

Scratch was sitting in front of the cat box, staring expectedly up at him, "MOW."

Vegeta grimaced, "Oh, hell no. I am not cleaning your shit."

"MOW."

"No I said. Go take a crap somewhere else."

"MOW."

"I am going back to bed," Vegeta muttered, turning around back into the hallway.

There was Scratch, sitting in the middle of the hallway carpet.

"MOW."

"Wha-" Vegeta reared back, startled. He whirled his head back towards the bathroom, it was empty.

"MOW MOW." Scratch rubbed up against his legs.

"Ugh. Fine." Vegeta groaned, heading into the bathroom, the little black cat following close behind.

It took him close to half an hour, a lot of gagging and a lot more swearing, but the box was clean. The Prince of all Saiyans could only stare in defeat however as the family pet immediately hopped into the clean litter box and squatted.

Ah. Bed.

Vegeta finally collapsed, pulling the comforter up around his shirtless torso. He'd cleaned the crap box and fed the damn animal, now was his time to rest. Just as he was drifting off again, he felt the small thump near his feet, then the tiny paw taps heading up his body.

"Go away," he moaned, shoving his face against the pillow. Scratch hopped off of Vegeta's broad shoulder, then curled up right against his chest, his whole body vibrating with purrs.

Instead of being angry, Vegeta found that he somehow didn't mind having the cat there. Tired of fighting, he just closed his eyes, giving Scratch a rub right between the ears. There was a nip against his fingers, and then the rough scrape of Scratch's tongue. A love bite as Bulma called it.

Vegeta smirked as he felt the cat melt against him, still purring in its sleep.

Maybe he and this creature had more in common than he originally believed.


End file.
